Hey,
I've not posted on my blog for a long time...cos I couldn't be bothered with it haha...so went on a lil hiatus for a bit...but anyway....i'm going to have a lil tantrum fit just now.
Right now im on holiday in Hong Kong for 8 weeks...but this is my 2nd week I think? still another month to go....great....going to Singapore tomoro as well..
So anyway I'll tell you all about my holiday another time cos there's actually steam coming out from my head and I really wanna burst into tears cos im actually so upset...and angry at the same time...
Basically I've always had some issues with my mum. I always have lil arguments and I used to be soo scared of my mum cos sometimes in my opinion she handles things over the top. One time i didn't actually talk to her for months...and I lived in the same house. It was the longest I've not talked to my mum...and my dad...I don't get on with my dad at all. My dad always preferred my brothers over me cos he's hakka and they prefer boys...=[
So thats why I'm kinda close to my mum i guess but there's always been issues with her. Shes quite strict and sometimes I really don't know whats shes really thinking....The reason I'm upset it is cos I feel right now my mum prefers my lil brother over me. Like she talks to him in a nicer tone of voice but to me shes always shouting at me and always seems like she tries to find something to shout at me for. Like the stupidest stuff ever. It drives me nuts....not only that it really stresses me out as well. I always try to do stuff so my mum doesn't shout at me but she always find ways to.
For example, If it was my lil brother calls her and asks her where is or something...her tone of voice is so calming and nice. But like today...or whenever I try calling her to ask where she was, her tone is always angry, pissed off and everything and it just upsets me sooo much. I know she loves me...but sometimes she just drives me crazy...cos it feels like im not getting the same treatment...
My lil brother is like...a prince...never does anything to help round the house...and me its like i have to do everything and always get shouted at...DRIVES ME NUTS!!!
Like today i got back to the hotel and saw she was dried some clothes in the dryer so i took them out and ironed them and folded them etcetc. STILL got shouted at...FOR FECK SAKE. it just hit the point. Don't even know what ive done wrong seriously!!! sometimes i really just wanna just get away...
My aunties n uncle knows my mum always shouts at me for the stupidest reasons ever...To me it just feels like shes not even proud of me or anything, nothing I do shes pleased...My lil brother is like soooo stubborn and short-tempted and she NEVER says anything at all!!!! tbh i don't mind it...but sometimes I feel neglected i guess...though i know my mum does love me as well...but her way just seems shes not showing it....she never listens to my point of view or just thinks im stupid basically...
I really don't know how to express my feelings right now...but i'm pretty much unhappy with my mum...i'm gonna probs go to sleep and cry....just to let it all out....sorry for this post being really sad and unhappy...but I needed something to blur it all out....
xx
